Why Stakeholders Resist Consultants (And How To Overcome It)
Here's how you deal with those difficult situations when people actively or passively resist you in client engagements.
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The Higher You Go, The More Challenging Personalities You Will Encounter
Sometimes, it might be subtle - missed emails, slow responses, or endless requests for more information. Sometimes, it might be rather less subtle - public challenges to your expertise or backchannel efforts to derail your project.
It’s often not fair (or enjoyable), but part of being a consultant is being able to deal with it and ensure your project succeeds.
Resistance is rarely about the work itself. More often, it stems from deeper fears—about status, control, or existing loyalties. Understanding these fears is the key to managing them effectively.
In this post, I’ll break down the three most common forms of resistance consultants face—passive, active, and covert resistance—and share practical strategies for navigating each one. Whether you're dealing with stonewalling, public pushback, or hidden political manoeuvring, these tactics will help you keep your project on track.
What Internal Resistance Is Really About
Resistance, however, usually boils down to fear about their standing, control, and current allegiances. As I’ve written before, this includes:
They fear what you represent. They might feel they could have undertaken the project and are upset that someone else was brought in to do the work they wanted to do. They fear a loss of standing. They might see you as a threat to their work or their ego. This is by far the biggest cause of resistance.
They disagree with your recommendations. They might disagree with your approach and recommendations. This can come from a very genuine and honest place.
They don’t personally like you. This is rare, but it happens. You might have done something which they didn’t like (or, more likely, they interpreted it through the worst possible lens). It is usually possible to overcome this with direct contact and good communication.
These feelings are natural and human. Some people hate the idea of an external consultant intruding on their turf.
In my experience, people don’t usually say that directly. Instead, they do at least one of three things - all of which you need to be able to manage well.
This results in three common behaviours.
1. Passive Resistance (Stonewalling)
These folks won’t confront you directly but will try to sabotage your consultant engagement. They will usually do this by:
Ignoring emails, requests, or deadlines (or taking considerable time to respond).
Withholding critical information or access to key people.
Deprioritising tasks related to your work.
Requesting excessive data, reports, or unnecessary approvals.
Often, they do or give the minimum amount of information required. They don’t want a conflict, so if asked, they simply say they’re too busy (even if the request takes seconds).
How To Handle It
The best way to handle any resistance is to build strong relationships with them at the beginning of the project and keep them engaged in the journey. You should never surprise stakeholders with recommendations in meetings in front of others.
However, even with the best early engagement efforts, some people might resist you. And you have to figure out how to work with that.
The direct question. My favourite approach is to simply raise the issues directly with the person to uncover a potential issue which can be resolved. The challenge is to do this without causing a deeper conflict:
“Hi [name],
Is it possible to hop on a quick call to chat about [project]?
It might just be me, but I’m sensing some concerns to address. I know we’ve made a few requests of you that we’re waiting on. I’d love to chat quickly, understand where you’re at, and see if there’s anything I can do to help things proceed a little quicker.
Don’t say anything that can be perceived as antagonistic or accusatory, yet be clear about your concern (i.e., what behaviour you want to change).
The likelihood is you either won’t get a response, the recipient will say they’re too busy, or they will deny any problem. But sometimes, the person will hop on a call, and you can make a personal connection to overcome these issues.
A friend once struggled to get a response from a critical stakeholder, so she drove two hours to the office to meet him in person. He apologised profusely and gave her all the time she needed—the direct connection matters.
Make Non-Response Visible
If direct engagement fails (either you don’t get a response or the behaviour doesn’t change), it’s time to nudge them to respond by ensuring no response is visible.
This can include:
Using email threads with key stakeholders CC’d to create accountability.
Summarising the situation in meetings:
“I’m just waiting on [X] to do [Y] to proceed”
Or asking others.
“Has anyone heard from [X] about this?”
If they’re blocking access to key people, go around them by engaging others:
"I was hoping you could help, as I haven't been able to get an answer on X."If delays persist, involve their manager or a senior executive in a neutral way:
"I know [Name] is busy, but this is delaying the project. Who else can help move this forward?" - Frame it as needing help rather than calling them out.
You’re not trying to escalate a situation but are now putting the project outcomes before the personal relationship.
Give Deadlines & Use Soft Consequences
If none of the above worked, it’s time to add clear deadlines and consequences. One key thing here is to set a deadline, highlight the consequences, and avoid project hell.
Instead of open-ended requests, say:
"To stay on track, I need X by [date]. If that’s not possible, let me know who can assist."Follow up with:
"Since we didn’t receive X, we had to proceed based on available information."—this creates urgency.
The explicit goal is to nudge people to do what they should do. Make it clear to colleagues that they’re not doing what they need to do, and then create a sense of urgency to respond to make it happen. Be clear that the project will suffer without their engagement.
Whatever you do, don’t let the project get stalled because you’re not getting the response you need. That’s precisely what passive resisters want.
2. Active Resistance (Direct & Public Challenges)
These folks are usually more senior than passive resisters and confident enough of their standing to challenge you directly. They will:
Challenge your experience and experience during meetings.
Publicly criticise or disagree with your recommendations and findings.
Aggressively question your data, methodology, or approach.
Intentionally misrepresent or misuse recommendations.
I’ve usually found that these folks will disagree with almost any recommendations you make - even if they align with what they want.
How To Handle It
The critical thing about dealing with these folks is never to bite the hook.
These folks often want the fight. They have better relationships and more knowledge of the organisation than you. A public battle works far better in their favour than yours. You should never raise your voice, argue publicly, or show anger towards them.
Unless they make a direct personal attack, in which case you need to set clear boundaries, you should always treat what they say as helpful information. Here are some steps.
Ask who might be against the project and pre-empt problems. Before a project begins, ask your contact(s) who might oppose this project and proactively seek to engage them. Use the key techniques to win over hostile stakeholders. Compliment them, ask them for advice, and ask them for help. It’s hard to be hostile to people who are exceedingly friendly towards you.
Bring them with you on the journey. Never blindside these folks in a group meeting with ideas or recommendations you haven’t shared with them privately. Bring them with you on the journey. Check-in, gather feedback, get their opinions etc.…
Don’t get defensive, ask for information and/or stay factual. If you are aggressively challenged in the meeting either on your recommendations or your expertise, stay composed at all times:
If they challenge your expertise. Ask them about their concerns so you can address them:
“That’s a fair point, can you share the specific concerns you have so I can make sure we address them?”.
If they are challenging your recommendations. Ask them for their alternative approaches.
"I hear you, what alternative approach would you suggest?"
Often they might reply with “I don’t know, but I know this approach is wrong”. In which case they’re implicitly saying it’s the best approach you have.
If they misrepresent your findings or disagree, calmly clarify:
“I see how that interpretation could arise, but what I actually found was…”Identify possible areas of pushback and prepare strong, data-backed responses.
“A concern raised before was X, so we validated this with [data/source].” - this neutralizes their attack before they make it.
3. Covert Resistance (Backchannel Tactics)
These folks are much harder to spot because they tend to work in the backchannels. They often won’t address issues directly with you but will manoeuvre behind the scenes - typically leveraging existing relationships with senior stakeholders.
This will include:
Lobbying executives or decision-makers against the consultant.
Spreading rumours or misinformation.
Aligning with other resistant stakeholders to block progress.
Unless someone gives you a heads-up, spotting these folks is very hard. They won’t raise objections in meetings; they won’t disagree directly - but they will raise issues in other meetings.
If you go into a meeting with a client to discover that something has suddenly changed or a decision that wasn’t aligned with your recommendations, this is why.
How To Handle Covert Resistors
Since they’re harder to spot, the room for manoeuvre is limited.
Make your work public and document everything.
Share updates widely as per your stakeholder mapping:
As discussed in our last meeting, we agreed on X.”
This makes it harder for them to distort reality.
Proactively engage senior stakeholders.
If they hold power, ensure senior stakeholders are aligned with your work early. Regularly check in with them, ensure you’re aligned, and ask questions like:
“Has anything changed that I should be aware of before we finalize this?”
Bring outside influence to light
If you sense there is outside influence on your work, first try to find out who it was so you can contact them. Ask allies directly and send then a message with the covert resister.
"I want to make sure we’re aligned. Are there concerns you haven’t shared in our meetings?"
Usually just having a direct conversation can change the resister to a supporter.
If you sense backchanneling, discreetly ask allies:
"I heard some concerns were raised outside our meetings—do you know what they are?"Bringing issues into the open reduces their ability to manipulate the narrative
If a decision suddenly shifted or changes without explanation, gently expose it:
“I’d love to understand what new factors led to this shift so we can incorporate them.”
This puts the burden on the covert operator to justify the change.
Covert operators are the hardest to deal with - but you should take the steps you need to get things right.
Disagreement Isn’t The Same As Resistance
It’s crucial not to confuse disagreement with resistance.
People should feel welcome to disagree with you and your recommendations. Positive and constructive disagreement can surface important information. You might uncover internal sensitivities to consider or valid reasons why the recommendations can’t be implemented.
However, it’s usually best to express this in private to avoid influencing perceptions of the project and prevent people from needing to defend themselves in front of others.
The difference between disagreement and resistance is that people still want you to succeed when there's disagreement. They want to help you avoid making mistakes and ensure you benefit from their experience and expertise.
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